6 posts tagged “wedding”
I just got the DVD with all of my bridal portraits and I am amazed. Jennifer Nichols and her husband (http://www.jnicholsphoto.com/) did the shoot at the old cotton mill in McKinney, Texas. It was about 1,000 degrees, and the air was humid and full of pigeon poop, but they made me feel beautiful and captured me how I always think I look in my head, but never quite look like in real life. They are very very talented. If you need a photographer in or around Austin, Texas you couldn't do much better than the two of them.
I like the "Attack of the 50-foot Bride" feel of this one. It's like straight out of the nightmare of a commitment-phobic man. "I'm coming to wed you! RAWR!!!!"
My wedding photographer is a genius. She showed me a couple of pics from the 189 metric buttloads she shot at my wedding and they are fab.
Ron had this brilliant idea to have the story of our relationship included in the wedding program, but use quotes from our blogs and emails to tell the story. It was the second best idea he's ever had (the first being marrying me, of course...)
They are as follows....
How did Ron & Ashley’s story begin? Well, it all started with a boy, a girl and a three-day trial on Match.com…
Ron’s headline & profile
“The Biggest Jerk You'll Ever Meet... and the Computer Says We're A Match!
…and the description of himself and his “Ideal Match”
I’m thirty-five. I live at home with my mom. My hair is thinning and my beer gut isn’t getting any smaller. I have a 1972 pinto that I painted to look like the General Lee on The Dukes of Hazard. I joined match cause this was an easy way to find hot girls without all the work of talking to them first. So basically what I’m looking for is a girl who’s totally hot, has a good job, buys me stuff, lets me hang at her place and drink beer, lends me her car, gives me money, doesn’t nag me and really digs strip clubs. If I turned up in your search then the computer thinks we’re a match and we should totally hook up.
The ’72 Pinto caught the eye of Ashley who was on the last day of free trial to the internet dating site. When Ashley & Ron did “totally hook up” for a first date, they were anxious to meet for the first time.
Ashley: I’m trying to be cautiously optimistic and failing miserably. I’m all out excited. We're going to have the cutest story if we end up together. And isn't that how all the best relationships start? With a cute story?
Of course, Ashley did her best to suppress her neurotic tendencies.
Ashley: As I got closer to restaurant, I got more nervous and was alternately practicing my smile in the rearview mirror, and talking to myself. Then telling myself to stop talking to myself. Then telling myself that telling myself to stop talking to myself was still, technically, talking to myself. It's complicated being me.
And it was the first of a great many dates for the both of them.
Ashley: We went and saw "Stardust", which was an awesome movie. We both laughed at same stuff. He smells yummy. He has good ADD drugs. So I guess this is all working out well so far. Le sigh, le swoon, le float.
Ron: It was another great date night with Ashley and we left the theater acting like a couple of goof-balls knowing we don't have to resent all those happy couples that used to make us gag. Now they can now resent us.
Ashley: Fourth date sounds just ridiculous because surely we have known each other longer. Surely we've been hanging out for years sharing stories, creating inside jokes, listening, laughing, commiserating. This cannot be the fourth date.
Ron (first Dinner with Ashley’s girls): It was the first dinner Ashley ever cooked and it was delicious. Without warning, her adorable girls opened their mouths uttering an apocalyptic noise described only the book of Revelations Being that it was very early in our dating relationship, I felt it inappropriate to curb the girls charming behavior. I quietly picked another piece of broccoli from my hair and placed it back on my plate. To my relief Ashley acted as I would’ve expected a parent to. "Here we go," I thought as her mouth opened to deliver a gentle rebuff given that company was present. Instead, Ashley unleashed the sound of Hell itself, launching a fresh round of broccoli and mashed potatoes into my hair. High fives all around.
"So this condition,” I asked, untangling my hair from rapidly drying gravy. “Is it genetic?"
And through all the time together they started to fall in love.
Ashley: I'm sorry if I'm still somewhat mute. Partly I just feel comfortable enough with you to just be quiet. Partly I don't want to start a verbal waterfall that I can't stop. Part of me is really scared, but a bigger part of me is telling that part to shut up. So yeah, there's a little mini-war in my head that I'm trying to silence. Meanwhile I can't think of anything I've enjoyed more than just being with you.
Ron: In all seriousness, Ashley's been great and I love her. She's made me feel very special even though she's baked a life-size birthday cake that she plans to jump out of while wearing the Princess Lea bikini costume from Return of the Jedi. What a swell gal!
Ashley (using quotes from Ron): The immediacy and intensity of this is just completely serendipitous. I hesitate to use his words without his consent, but he has a skill to describe things better than I can. I've never met anyone who can do this, who can read my mind and speak it more eloquently to the point where all I want to say is "Um, yeah that" every time he speaks. But here is my very favorite thing he's ever written, and that I've ever read. It perfectly describes how I feel.
" It's like a knocking over a bucket of red paint and watching with unconscious helplessness as it runs all over the floor and under the doors into the other rooms."
Then it finally happened...
Ron: Well, it's finally happened. Ashley asked me to marry her. After months of anticipation and many sleepless nights my worries of losing such a wonderful woman are over. I'm such a lucky guy! When she got down on one knee, I was stunned.
"No, no, no, you are not doing this... Are you doing this? Please oh please I hope you are doing this!" My head was spinning. She pulled out the black velvet box and opened the lid!
"Ron, you have made me the happiest woman in the world and I don't think I could ever live the rest of my life without you." Her eyes were sparkling from the reflection caused by the moon's light on the ring. "Will you marry me?"
The facts may be a little backwards, but in any case, one of them said yes. Of course, the relationship only got deeper from there…
Ashley: Even when everything in my life feels like its swirling around and upside down... even when nothing make sense and all the answers just bring about more questions... I know that he will love me and remind me of everything that is right with the world, and right with me. I never thought I could, but I now believe in love and its power to make me maybe not a better person, but certainly a more complete one.
…even when they were apart.
Ashley: And of course, I'll miss him. I look forward to missing him. I told him about a week ago "I can't wait to miss you," and I truly meant it. I've never had that long absence with joy at the end. Dread, disappointment, frustration yes. But never joy. Having someone to miss is a great luxury to me and I wouldn't trade it for all the solitary eyebrow plucking in the world
Ron: Passengers from the plane jockeyed for position around the baggage carousel, but my mind was too preoccupied with what Noah, Harrison and Sawyer were doing, how my parents were feeling, and about making money to pay bills. But in any case, I was home. Not because I returned to my daily dose of regular issues to contend with, but because, unlike the previous returns from seeing my boys, there was someone wonderful waiting to hug me when I walked in the door. As much as I missed my sons, I was equally happy to be missed while I was away.
Today the two of them will pledge their love before family and friends.
Ashley: Now I've got someone who loves me so completely, who knows me so well, who makes me laugh and makes me think and makes me 83% happier than I ever thought possible. I know that as long as he's by my side, I won't care what path I'm on. As long as he lets me love him as well as he's loved me, then the next 30 years will without a doubt be the best and I hope for at least another 30 after that.
Ron: What she said, except I’m closer to 92% happier…
…and they lived happily ever after. I guess internet dating really does work.
My wedding is officially less than a week away. Almost everything is taken care of, except for 2 crucial bits: my wedding bouquet and the song I'm walking down the aisle to. The bouquet I'm not stressed about. That will work itself out. But the song keeps me awake at night.
At first I was thinking of Carl Orff's "Carmina Burana". You know, for the sake of subtlety... But then I thought maybe like Darth Vader's theme from Star Wars, or Moonlight Sonata by Beethoven, or basically anything other than Pachbel's Canon or anything else "traditional". (I warned you I was contrary....) So I'm joking about the other songs, but I truly have been searching for something that was unique, that was "me", and that would be meaningful.
Meanwhile, my mom has been stressing about wondering if I'll be okay walking down the aisle alone. My dad died when I was 16, my grampsy (who was more a real father to me) died when I was 18. So I told her in all honesty that I've had awhile to get used to the idea and it's not bothering me. That conversation however, inspired me to find the perfect song.
My dad was a musician and recorded several tapes. He was a guitarist, and most of his stuff was very southern electric rock. Think Stevie Ray Vaughan mated with Jimi Hendrix and you'll be close. But on his last tape there was a beautiful acoustic guitar instrumental called "Goodbye Lullabye" and I can't find it anywhere. The tape is somewhere in storage and I can't find it. My sister can't find her copy. I doubt my other sister has hers. I thought if I could play his music, then at least symbolically he would be walking me down the aisle.
I was listening to his other tapes last night, searching for this song. I came across old tape recordings of me and my mom talking when I was very young. I found some of her talking to my younger sister too. And some truly hellacious recordings of me singing along with Bette Midler to "Wind Beneath My Wings". But it ocurred to me that I was exhausting myself trying to find this song to honor this dad who didn't even care about me. Were he still alive, I doubt he would even show up to my wedding. He was an alcoholic and he was horrible to me and to my mom. I found myself glossing over all he had done to hurt me, so I could have some sappy tribute to him on my wedding day and I couldn't figure out why. Does he deserve it? Am I hoping to have some closure or reconciliation because of it? Wouldn't I be better off honoring my mom, my grandmother, my sister, all those who have loved me and supported me and lifted me up?
I'm still torn. It would be special to walk down the aisle to my dad's original composition. But why would it be special? Why do I need that? I've made it these 14 years without a meaningful father figure in my life. Why am I trying to conjure one up now? Hell, I can't even get my own step-dad to speak to me, much less come to my wedding. Why should I dig up that grave and bring another unwilling father to the event?
Maybe I'll just do "Here Comes the Bride" and be done with it. Or maybe....
....and there's room for me to hot glue peacock feathers on them!!!!
Something Old - family wedding handkerchief that's been passed down 5 generations now.
Something New - do the dress and the veil count for that?
Something Borrowed - this slot is still open if anyone is interested :)
Something Blue - Hooray for shoes!!!!!
Okay, okay fine. I wasn't going to put up a "ring only" pic, but I've had a few requests for it. So for the record, if you think I'm tacky then do two things: 1) blame all the people asking me for pics and 2) bite me. Not necessarily in that order.
Oh, and I know I haven't put up the official story of the proposal, which maybe I should. I sure as hell overshare just about everything else in my life. But for the moment I just want it to be my memory and not share it with everyone. Yes it was romantic and memorable and yes you'll hear about it soon, but for now it's mine and you can't have it. Nothing personal :)
